It’s called the Special Relationship, but it isn’t really is it. Not in the truest sense. Not any more.
Not if we are honest with ourselves.
It may have been back in the day. When the US and UK were in the first passionate flush of the Special Relationship. Just two global super powers who had loads in common.
But that was a long time ago. Now the UK is just starting to look a bit needy. Like we’re trying to keep the spark alive in a lopsided relationship that’s losing its fizzle.
Sure America calls us late at night when it needs us. When they want their ‘closest ally’ to tell them how great they are and that it’s definitely a legit invasion they’re planning.
But then, at summits when all the other bigger cooler countries are around, they suddenly become so cold towards us. They don’t want to hold hands. They just snort and mouth ‘no’ when we tell the other nations ‘we’re in a Special Relationship together’.
And they never put ‘in a Special Relationship with the United Kingdom’ on Facebook when we did. Like we wouldn’t notice. Well, we did. And it hurts, America. It hurts.
Yet we are still too scared to bring it up. To confront the devastating truth. So instead we send our PM over to meet the new President. To patch things up and remind them how they used to feel about us.
Yeah that’ll do it. A good old joint press conference. Both leaders side-by-side, telling the rest of the world we are still really happy together, no matter what the haters say.
But then, you see it.
The relationship, apparently, isn't quite special enough for the White House to spell British Prime Minister Theresa May's name correctly. pic.twitter.com/mAnYM92uWQ
— Matt Viser (@mviser) January 27, 2017
They can’t even get the name of our Prime Minister right. It’s true what France have been saying, you don’t care.
*UNCONTROLABLE SOBBING*