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04th May 2015

Chelsea is the World Champion, but who’s gonna make the awesome foursome?

Soccer Guy

Chelsea Franchise Club is the winningest franchise of EPL XXIII

With a bunch of soccer games still to play, Chelsea Franchise Club have already got themselves that EPL Cup.

The math was real simple heading into their game with the Crystal Palace Eagles: Go win and Roman Ibrahimovic’s guys would get their fingers inside world championship rings by sundown.

It was the EPL’s MVP who inserted the only goalshot of the game, head kicking into the ball bag after the goaltender made a hand denial from his deathstrike, right on half time-out.

Chelsea v Stoke City - FA Cup Quarter Final

With three games to play before they head off for their summer spring break, Terry John and the rest of the blue uniforms know they can just goof around and not even care.

Stevie Gee makes up for deathstrike fail

All tied up heading into the last few minutes with the Queens Power Rangers, Liver Pool fans must have thought it was morphin’ time for the score sheets when the soccer ref gave their guys a deathstrike.

28 Dec 1999:  Titi Camara of Liverpool celebrates during the FA Carling Premier League match against Wimbledon played at Anfield in Liverpool, England. The game finished in a 3-1 win for Liverpool.  Mandatory Credit: Alex Livesey /Allsport

Up stepped their very own Red Ranger, Stevie Gee with a chance to put the Mercy Towners into the lead. But Gee’s kick, right in front of the Cop, sucked so bad he should have got cuffed and sent to the station house.

DURBAN, SOUTH AFRICA - NOVEMBER 16: In this handout image provided by the ITM Group, Liverpool Legends players pose for a team photo during the Legends match between Liverpool FC Legends and Kaizer Chiefs Legends at Moses Mabhida Stadium on November 16, 2013 in Durban, South Africa. (Photo by Anesh Debiky/ITM Group via Gallo Images/Getty Images)

But right after committing his deathstrike crime, Stevie Gee was granted bail when he head kicked a cross pass home past the Power Rangers’ goaltender. It was enough for Liver Pool to hang on to their hopes of making the EPL awesome foursomes.

Wes Brownich Albinos kick Man Unity’s ass

In Manchester, the Unity looked to take a humongous step towards confirmizing their place as the fourth winningest franchise in the entire EPL League, but Wes Brownich Albinos were there to crash their awesome foursome tailgate party.

Fresh from having their asses handed to them at the Goodison Candy Shack last time out, the Unity got owned again as the Albinos completely dominized the Soccer Satans, winning by the one goalshot.

The goalshot itself was pretty neat. A felony kick was deliberately fired at the leg of Jonas Awesome who Rick O’Shead the soccer ball into the upper ninety of the Unity soccer goal interior.

WEST BROMWICH, ENGLAND - MARCH 6:  Geoff Horsfield of West Bromwich Albion celebrates his goal during the Nationwide Division One match between West Bromwich Albion and Coventry City at The Hawthorns on March 6, 2004 in West Bromwich, England.  (Photo by Matthew Lewis/Getty Images)

Louis van Gogh then watched as RSVP missed another deathstrike as the Albinos got what was undeniafiably another fair result.