A friend once attended a function where Wayne Rooney happened to be present.
Rooney, it is almost disappointing to report, is said to have sat quietly in the corner and kept himself to himself.
The message understood by all those in attendance was that he couldn’t take the chance that a selfie taken with another guest wouldn’t be misinterpreted somewhere and spun as a drunken Rooney story.
Clearly the chances of those misinterpretations taking place increase exponentially if Rooney is pictured at 5am at a wedding in the England team hotel where, as his spokesman put it, he had decided to “relax and celebrate a fine England victory”.
While other members of the squad went out in London, Rooney stayed and drank with members of the backroom staff and a few other players who, presumably, might have been in a position to issue some instructions about the manner of relaxing and celebrating a fine England victory if they felt they were doing anything wrong.
When the story first emerged, the FA played down the incident as did Rooney’s camp. This seemed wise as the player had broken no curfew, but had foolishly allowed himself to be pictured in his England top whilst drunk.
Rooney’s spokesman expressed disappointment that the story had got out, even if that sounded like a last desperate attempt to shift responsibility elsewhere.
“During the course of the evening he was approached by numerous fellow guests for autographs and pictures. As he has always been, Wayne was happy to sign, pose for photos and chat with guests. It is sad that one or two of them have now sought to turn Wayne’s friendly good nature to their advantage.”
Footballers like Rooney are aware of how little privacy they have which is why they speak to each other on the field with their hands over their mouths, but presumably this awareness dims a little the more you relax and celebrate a fine England victory late into the night.
Yet footballers are also castigated for being out of touch, but presumably it is too much of a response to that isolation for the England captain to happily pose for pictures while, according to one report, “paralytic”?
Rooney’s night out can be the starting point for many discussions about English football and its culture, but none of them have been advanced in a helpful way by the way the matter has been dealt with.
When Iceland beat England at the European Championships, it seemed as if the result would force the FA into a fundamental reassessment of their role in world football. What was needed was an exploration of everything to do with English football culture, but instead there has been a retreat to a bubble of self-importance. Every day they come into work and add a little bit more to the monument of bullshit they have been building for many years.
Sam Allardyce lasted 67 days and Gareth Southgate will shortly become the England manager, essentially because he seems incapable of doing anything offensive or inappropriate.
“All England personnel have a responsibility to behave appropriately at all times. We will be reviewing our policy around free time while on international duty,” the FA statement said this week in response to the night out. Or night in.
Rooney’s behaviour has became the latest issue where their resolve seemed to be less important than the desire to be seen to do the right thing. He is not the only player who will be reminded of his responsibilities, even if it is hard to know what those responsibilities are.
No serious message will be delivered about how athletes should behave while on time off through this public scolding. In fact if there is an educational point to young people or a suggestion of concern for the player, then they are likely to be lost as often happens when public relations is the most important consideration.
But the hysteria about Rooney’s behaviour suggests few lessons are being learned about England’s position in football.
England needed to back Rooney publicly, whatever they felt about his decision to break no rules and drink until 5am when he didn’t have a meaningful game for a week.
It is hard not to think that the reaction to Rooney is connected to the feeling that he’s yesterday’s man. For Manchester United, there is some truth in that. But it would be interesting to try to figure out how drunk Rooney would have to be to become a more limited player than Eric Dier.
More crucially, his importance or otherwise to the team should be irrelevant when a manager is in charge of a player who has to deal with headlines about being drunk while playing for his country.
England bowed to the pressure, when strong management and administration would have done the opposite. They revealed themselves to be more concerned with PR than anything to do with the key principles of building a team.
Rooney’s spokesman said the “images were inappropriate for someone in his position” and it was tempting to wonder what exactly that position is.
The England captain has no role in society, no matter how pompously some may view it. Nothing useful has been achieved by the talk of reviews of curfews and restrictions on socialising. All that has been achieved has been an increase in the suffocating intensity around England players. Maybe you can blame Rooney for that or maybe it is the responsibility of those who make the decisions to stand by those decisions when they have pretty predictable consequences.
England might have actually discovered something during the week. Not about Rooney – they know all there is to know about him – but about themselves. They have learned nothing meaningful from the two games they have played and when the World Cup comes around, they will suddenly remember that. But when things are tough during the World Cup, they might also remember how they dealt with events this week and they shouldn’t be surprised if they once again collapse under pressure.
