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27th Feb 2016

Apparently him from One Direction is dating Cheryl…and he’s paid tribute to her backside

JOE

We’ll be honest with you – we couldn’t really give a f*ck.

The Geordie lass from Girls Aloud is seeing him from One Direction. Good for them and all that but, well, whatever. There’s an age difference apparently and that’s somehow newsworthy.

But what did tickle us was what passes for modern romance between today’s celeb types. Twas a time when a box of chocolates or slap up meal would suffice in terms of wooing a lass.

British Fashion Awards 2015 - Red Carpet Arrivals : News Photo

But judging from this exceptional headline, times have changed – and we’re not exactly gutted that we’ve been left behind. It’s not exactly matching rings but it’s in that area.

Behold! This is how the kids of today express their love…

That’s right – ‘He inks copy of her bum roses on hand’ – the old romantic!

In case you didn’t know, Cheryl has flowers tattoo’d on her arse and he has now got a matching design on his hand. If Shakespeare was alive today, we’re pretty he’d scribe a sonnet about it…