Not all pizza toppings were created equal.
As we have explained in the past, God’s favourite foodstuff (probably) has two hard-and-fast rules. Pepperoni good, pineapple bad.
There are, of course, some smaller rules that help lay out the hierarchy of pizza toppings. You can take a look here if you want to avoid making a faux pas in the future.
Now, we haven’t met every single world leader, but we can say with confidence that Guðni Thorlacius Jóhannesson is our favourite.
Future president of #Iceland on the stadium with fans #RESPECT #icelandic #wg #watchingoals pic.twitter.com/gKTgvRjd4m
— watchingoals (@watchingoals) July 5, 2016
Jóhannesson is a former university lecturer and the current President of Iceland.
And, considering his background in education, we can say with confidence that he is an intelligent man. An intelligent man who wants – correctly, we might add – to ban pineapple as a pizza topping.
Now, some of you will claim we’re just saying this to justify our pre-existing beliefs about pizza, to which we say this: they’re not beliefs. They’re facts.
Pineapple is an above-average fruit but it has no place on a pizza, and the leader of a better footballing country than this one agrees.
https://twitter.com/myIoveiscooI/status/833829086761988098
https://twitter.com/stavvers/status/834036535129468928
The president made the objectively accurate comments during a visit to Akureyri, a town in the north of Iceland.
We imagine the town, where maximum temperatures rarely top 15°C, doesn’t have a steady supply of locally-grown tropical fruit. So perhaps this was as much a warning about carbon-inefficient import procedures as it was an education about the stupidity of combining mozzarella with fruit.
For his next task, Jóhannesson may have to get on to his country’s supermarket namesake, who – at the time of writing – still stock two separate ham and pineapple pizza ranges. Then again, they also offer hotdog stuffed crust, so they may be beyond help.
Catch up with this week’s episode of 888sport Football Friday Live
