The *holds back tears* Absolute Boy.
Finally, someone that’s prepared to tackle the real issues.
Jezza has been speaking to The Guardian about a variety of topics, but none more important than the current Freddo price scandal which has engulfed this nation for nigh on 100,000 years.
He was asked “Why are Freddos constantly going up in price? Is there a secret Freddo tax we don’t know about?” and responded with:
“I think there is a very obvious motive: those that make Freddos know it’s popular, so they’re making a bit more money.”
This is an incredible answer. It’s very diplomatic, but also gets in a slight dig at the fact that we are undoubtedly being exploited by a minuscule piece of chocolate that costs a staggering 30p. They know it’s popular. They know we’ll pay anything for a bite of that sweet frog-shaped pie. We are merely pawns in this sadistic game.
Corbyn was then asked a question that is on the lips of every citizen in the United Kingdom at all times. Would he reduce the price of Freddos? He answered:
“I think we need to examine this question in some detail and see if there is excessive profit-making by those who make Freddos – then they’ve got us to answer to.”
So it’s not an outright “Yes absolutely, things have gone too far and it is a disgrace”, but we’ll take it.
Jeremy Corbyn wants to investigate whether there’s “excessive profit-making”, which is the most positive turn of phrase we in the Reduce Freddo Price Community have heard in a long time.
Freddo makers are rightfully quaking in their boots as the news hits them this afternoon that they might be faced with “us to answer to”, ‘us’ meaning a big group of burly men with knuckle dusters alongside Jeremy ‘Fair Price Freddo Advocate’ Corbyn.
In an attempt to be objective, we must ask ourselves: Is this just a case of Corbyn thirsting after that sweet sweet millennial vote? Honestly, who cares. Anyone that’s willing to be outspoken about the grave Freddo price injustice should be running the world tbqh.
Today is a step in the right direction.
Our next milestone is #Freddos10pBy2020 or Corbyn is done.
