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11th Oct 2016

Memphis Depay’s love for Paul ‘Bieber’ Pogba has been distracting him from football

Find someone who looks at you the way Memphis looks at Pogba.

Tom Victor

Have you tried concentrating on work when a really famous person shows up to your place of work?

Maybe the Prime Minister once rocked up at your bank for a media day, or Prince William did a tour of the school where you teach.

To say it’s distracting would be an understatement. Hell, even your bosses will be sat wide-eyed tapping away at non-existent keys to the right of their laptop and pouring water over their shoulder as they miss their dropped jaw by a couple of inches.

And that’s just politicians and royalty we’re talking about – imagine being within a couple of yards of Paul fucking Pogba.

Memphis was clearly awestruck when his Netherlands side went down 1-0 to a characteristic #POGBOOM in Monday night’s World Cup qualifier, and the photo he shared afterwards showed his face frozen in an expression normally reserved for fans of Justin Bieber or One Direction.

It’s the ‘I can’t believe he touched me’ emotion normally reserved for Bieber throwing you his snapback, or Harry Styles remembering your name.

No wonder Memphis struggled to focus in the 1-0 defeat, and no wonder he’s so far struggled to leave a lasting impression in Manchester United training since José Mourinho took over at Old Trafford.

Sure, he might have set the club back £25m, but we shouldn’t forget he’s just a precocious youngster delighted to be on the same pitch as one of the world’s greatest.

He’s just like any of us (if you ignore the Rolls Royce), and surely that’s something we should applaud.

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