Memphis Depay doesn’t get it – why does what he chooses to wear attract so much ridicule?
This week he defended his rather unique style to Dutch newspaper Algemeen Dagblad, stressing that his attire is just an extension to his personality, and undeserving of mockery.
“Why should I change? Some people collect postage stamps; I like fashion and discovering new things,” philosophised Memphis. “I feel good doing that. If I would put on what you want me to put on, I wouldn’t be myself anymore.”
That’s all well and good, but does he flop in the fashion stakes, or is he a sartorial trailblazer? We investigate by running the rule over some of his signature looks…
Look: Smart casual tennis attire
Verdict: This is a very good start. Keeping it well tailored and simple. Very smart indeed, and Romelu Lukaku is a nice accessory.
Look: Urban safari Atten-bro
Verdict: The explorer’s hat keeps him stealth and cool as he observes his prey – which seems to be a young chap in swimming trunks.
Look: Grease isn’t the word
Verdict: Big fail here. Memphis has come preppy to a rockabilly night. Even the camouflage jacket can’t hide his embarrassment.
Look: Rum DMC (with a hint of glam rabbi)
Verdict: Much more like it. M-Deeps and his boy are on point, and this is a strong look. Shalom, motherf*ckas.
Look: Theapolis Depay Wildebeast
Verdict: If this getup is meant to look ghetto fabulous it’s most certainly does not. Cruise ship magician with a hint of Lenny Henry – in a bad way.
Look: Dressed in the dark
Verdict: This is about four different looks in one – all bad. Indigenous Peruvian meets Kanye Tribute Act meets Galactic Chav meets GI Jane. These looks should never meet, not even on the internet.
Look: Back to the Future Drawing Board
Verdict: Roads? Where we’re going we don’t need roads…or mirrors. Hoverboard by Argos, outfit by accident. Marty McCry me a river.
Look: Memphis DeGAP Boxing Day Sale
Verdict: For someone who prides himself as something of a fashion innovator, this is very dowdy. Like a concerned dad dropping his son off at uni. And a former polytechnic at that.
Look: Kareem Abdul-Jajingle Bells
Verdict: We don’t understand anymore. Are nor should we. Memphis – dress how you like, and ignore anyone who tells you different.
All images via Memphis Depay’s Instagram account.
