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Sport

03rd Sep 2015

Ronaldo is so vain, he probably thinks this story’s about him

You're so vain...

Nooruddean Choudry

It’s no secret that Cristiano Ronaldo is pretty fond of himself. Let’s just say he doesn’t suffer from a lack of self-confidence.

He’s handsome, fit and great at football – and f**k me, doesn’t he know it. Just when you think his vanity has peaked, he manages to take narcissism to another level.

Let’s have a look at just five examples of Ronnie’s ego getting the better of him…

Opening a museum in his own honour

This is a little bit like pointing to the name on the back of your shirt after scoring…times a million. It takes some balls to devote a whole visitor attraction to yourself.

In fairness to Ronaldo, he sees the ‘CR7 Museum’ as a personal tribute to Madeira’s favourite son – it’s not his fault if that happens to be him…

Commissioning his own private waxwork

The problem with opening a you-themed museum in your home-town is what do you do if you live in a whole other country?

Simple – you pay £27,000 for an identical waxwork of your yourself to be created for your Madrid mansion, so you’ll never be far from a 3D version of your one true love…

Naming his son Cristiano Ronaldo Jr

Becoming a father is a life-changing event. It gives you a fresh perspective on life and forces you to become less self-obsessed and vain.

There’s no doubting that Ronaldo is very sweet with his five-year-old son, but naming him Cristiano Ronaldo Jr? Just a tad egotistical…

Specifically requesting a huge erection of himself

As well as a museum, another generous gift that Ronaldo gifted his native Portugal was a huge statue of himself in the city of Funchal.

The giant bronze erection shows the Real Madrid star in his classic free-kick pose – with what looks like teammate Luka Modric stuffed down the front of his shorts…

A very Ronaldo sunset photograph

We rest our case…