What’s cooler than being cool? Being a millennial Tory!
Much was made post-election, not least on this very website, of Labour’s success in tapping into the hitherto maligned youth vote. Under Jeremy Corbyn, they were successful in mobilising the vote of what is traditionally seen as an apathetic demographic.
Indeed, a recent YouGov survey of 18 to 24 year olds suggested that 66% intend to vote Labour with only 14% backing the Conservative Party.
But now the Tories are coming out fighting in a bid to win back those young voters, and the Labour Party had better be scared.
In Activate, a self-styled independent grassroots campaign organisation in the vein of Labour’s Corbyn-aligned Momentum launched to much fanfare last week, the Conservatives finally have a youth wing to be proud of.
Whereas Labour’s strategy has been predictably to offer young voters free stuff and to mobilise a dedicated army of activists blah blah, the Conservatives’ new grassroots youth movement has already shown a canny ability to capture the zeitgeist and appeal to teens and millennials by creating viral #memes for youths to #rt (retweet).
So shaken have lefties been by the power of the Activate memes that one of them actually hacked into their Twitter account and posted a similar, misspelled meme, just to discredit them.
Furthermore, Marxist blogger troll Guido Fawkes released a transcript from an Activate Whatsapp conversation in which members called for the “gassing of chavs”, just to make it look like Activate members think it’s funny to joke about gassing chavs. What it actually showed was not only do young Tories use WhatsApp like regular millennials, but they also have banter. Youths love banter.
Fascist undertones aside, a strong first week from Activate.
But the next election won’t be won on viral memes alone. So what else does the Conservative Party have to offer millennials? Free higher education? A living wage? The return of EMA? Rent caps? No. The secret weapon that will win the next election for the Tories is none other than backbench MP Jacob Rees-Mogg.
https://twitter.com/hrtbps/status/889972464314437633
Moggmentum, the campaign for Rees-Mogg to become the next Prime Minister, has seen the relative unknown catapulted into the spotlight as a cult figure and bookies’ favourite should a leadership contest be triggered by Theresa May’s resignation. Despite his privileged unbringing, Rees-Mogg showed with his first tweet that he is down with the kids, writing in what I assume to be some street slang. It is, in youth parlance, both based and lit af (as flip).
Tempora mutantur, et nos mutamur in illis.
— Jacob Rees-Mogg (@Jacob_Rees_Mogg) July 15, 2017
Critics have pointed out that the MP for North East Somerset’s voting record is less than ideal in terms of aligning with the views of younger voters.
Yes, he voted against same-sex marriage, but he does funny Instagram posts.
Granted, he wants to repeal the Human Rights Act, but he wears epic double-breasted suits.
OK, he has consistently voted to reduce spending on welfare, and to raise tuition fees, but he called his sixth child Sixtus! The man’s a bloody legend, and irony-loving millennials will love him. Just look at the popularity of another self-styled total ledge, Boris Johnson.
Fellow youths. You’ve #retweeted the #memes, bought yourself an ironic double-breasted suit and taught yourself some basic Latin. Now what?
Clearly you need to book yourself a ticket for the music event of the year, Tory Glastonbury.
George Freeman, MP for Mid Norfolk, has described his Tory Glastonbury as “a cross between Hay-on-Wye and the Latitude Festival”. The event’s location has been kept top secret for fear of being gatecrashed by jealous lefties, like some sort of cool warehouse party. With between 150-200 attendees expected, is sure to ensure the Conservative Party stays in Government for the near future.
So, teens and millennials of Britain, put down your Game Boys and Pokemon Go join the Tories! Word.
