This could escalate. This could really get out of hand fast
Is this the end of the days? Is this how it all comes crashing to a halt, civilization itself, because people starting eating this cheese, this cheese hotter than the sun, and afterwards just spontaneously combust?
This is it, isn’t it. Because if there’s two things we, as humans, can’t resist, it’s cheese and a challenge we know we have no chance of completing. This is how the world ends.
Morrisons know what they are doing here. They know we are going to buy it, either to impress our mates or because it looks dangerous, or simply because we get to the cheese counter, have no actual clue about cheese other than avoid anything blue, and panic.
It’s ominously called the “Reaper Chilli Cheddar” and comes with a warning from, I don’t know what they’re called, the cheese givers behind the counter, before the let you stroll home with a block of incendiary cheese and attempt to eat it all in one go with a single cream cracker.
According to the Guinness World Records, the Carolina Reaper is the world’s hottest chilli with an average heat level of 1,569,300 Scoville Heat Units (SHU), whilst a Jalapeño chilli registers only 5,000 SHU on average.
That’s some serious heat. That’s even more heat than the film Heat, which I guess isn’t really about heat as a temperature at all, but more the metaphysical ‘heat of the moment’. Anyway. Ridiculously hot cheese is here.
The Reaper Chilli Cheddar costs £1.50 for a 120g serving which is probably enough to make steam come out of your ears like an early episode of Tom & Jerry.
Daniel Barrett, Deli Cheese Buyer at Morrisons, said: “Some customers have told us that they’d love us to sell more really hot foods. So they’ve increasingly been buying cheddars with chilli in and this is the hottest we’ve ever served. It is perfect on top of a BBQ burger but it’s definitely not for the faint-hearted.”
Be careful out there, cheese lovers. Consume responsibly. Or not, but at least film yourself crying molten lava tears afterwards and stick it on YouTube for us.
Cheers. Nice one.
