Well this is a new one
Xherdan Shaqiri, who hasn’t made an appearance for Liverpool since coming on as a substitute during their 0-0 draw against Manchester United on February 24, has withdrawn from the Switzerland squad due to an ‘inflammation of the pubic area’. Yikes.
The Kosovan-born winger, who has 78 caps and 22 caps for his adopted country, will be sorely missed during their European Championship qualifiers against Georgia and Denmark. As he was named on the bench for Liverpool’s 2-1 win away at Fulham on Sunday, albeit as an unused substitute, the announcement is also a fairly surprising one for his national team.
And the less said about the implication of ‘inflammation of the pubic area’, the better.
L’équipe suisse doit renoncer aux services de Xherdan Shaqiri en Géorgie (23.3) et contre le Danemark (26.3.). Le joueur souffre d’une inflammation à la zone pubienne. Shaqiri a quitté l’équipe ce soir. Son remplaçant sera annoncé mardi. #GEOSUI #SUIDEN
— 🇨🇠Nati (@nati_sfv_asf) March 18, 2019
There is, of course, a fairly reasonable explanation for Shaqiri’s withdrawal, with injury analyst Ben Dinnery believing that it could be osteitis pubis, which is a ‘painful overuse injury that affects the pelvis and most commonly occurs during kicking activities’.
Sounds completely reasonable, right?
Well, try searching ‘Shaqiri crabs’ on Twitter and see whether the fans are buying it.
Clue: they are not. Poor Xherdan. This kind of thing is inevitable when you’re 5 foot 5 and have a physique like Johnny Bravo. The ladies can’t resist.
Confirmation of why Shaqiri has been withdrawn from the upcoming @UEFAEURO qualifiers.
'Inflammation of the pubic area'
Could be Osteitis Pubis which is a painful overuse injury that affects the pelvis and most commonly occurs during kicking activities.https://t.co/nA6psRb0Io https://t.co/uUYJICbgoI
— Ben Dinnery (@BenDinnery) March 19, 2019
