Week 8 – Danish Bakes!
Last night’s GBBO saw the contestants tackling the tricky world of Danish baking.
Truthfully, things are getting significantly less funny as the competition progresses, mostly because the bakers are all insanely good and therefore making fewer mistakes.
Still, the content train must continue running, otherwise the internet will implode and we will all lose our jobs.
Here’s six HiLaRiOuS moments from last night’s GBBO.
1. Finally, we got to see our first swan-mato of the series!!!
It took eight lengthy weeks, but on last night’s GBBO, we finally got to see our first ‘swan-mato’ of the series. Every year, a swanmato appears on the show. Usually invisible to the naked eye, last night we finally got a glimpse of one as it presented itself to the masses. Briony had fashioned it herself, unaided by a professional and it stunned viewers nationwide. Unfortunately, Briony later dropped the swanmato on the floor and it passed away peacefully upon impact. As Nelly Furtado sang, ‘Flames to dust, lovers to friends. Why do all good things come to an end’?
2. Paul Hollywood can’t say ‘aeration’ properly because he is a big doofus
Sure, he can bake bread better than pretty much every human alive, but can he say ‘aeration’ properly? No, he bloody well cannot. Hollywood kept talking about the “airy-ation” in the Danish baked goods, like some kind of idiot with a net worth of £10m. Big bloody fool, can’t even say ‘aeration’ right. Should he even be a judge on GBBO after this has come to light? I’ll certainly struggle to take him seriously after this blunder and surely cannot be alone in this dilemma. Bring back Mary Berry. She can pronounce everything correctly.
3. Noel performed the greatest magic trick the world has ever seen
Noel, master of everything he touches, pulled a string of bunting right out of his mouth as Sandi looked on in amazement whilst casually eating a jar of herring. Noel Fielding, accomplished comedian, writer, actor, artist and television presenter can now add magician to his CV after this momentous display. Where did the seemingly infinite supply of flags come from? Are they stored in his stomach? Blatantly trailing behind is back as seen in the above image? Who knows. Perhaps it is simply magic.
4. RAHUL SWORE! HE SAID A BAD WORD! HE DID IT!
Eight weeks into the series and we’ve had our first use of the infamous GBBO censorship bleep. Things just didn’t go to plan for Rahul at all during this week’s challenges, particularly the showstopper, which resulted in him letting out an exasperated swear word. But what was the word? It was so seamlessly bleeped, we didn’t get the beginning or end of the word. Personally, I believe it might have been “Sugar” or “Fudge” or “Bring back Mary Berry”. Sadly, we may never truly know what was said on that fateful day.
5. Kim-Joy momentarily became Kim-Woe
This part wasn’t hilarious, but the play on words certainly is. As well as the fact that she was sobbing whilst wearing pastry earrings. Kim-Joy’s feedback from the judges was quite stern, which she took to heart. Overcome with emotion, Kim-Joy rapidly descended into Kim-Woe as she cried on camera. It was a sad moment, but luckily she survived elimination, so everything is fine. She lives to regain the title of Kim-Joy once more.
6. EVERYONE DID COCAINE!!!
This specific brand of cocaine was referred to as ‘sherbet’, one that appears to be freely available under the guise of being “an effervescent powder” commonly found it sweets and treats. Regardless, it is definitely cocaine. Hollywood dived right into the powder which was used as a decorative element on Briony’s decorative bake, visibly alarmed by its potency. Next week they will try some marijuana, quite literally turning the show into the Great British Bake Off. Hurrah!
Images via Channel 4
