BONGO CHRIST
Danny Dyer. Danny. Dyer. What can you say about him? What else can you say?
He’s a direct descendant of William the Conqueror, Edward III, Jane Seymour’s sister Elizabeth and Oliver Cromwell.
He’s starred in Eastenders, the Grand Theft Auto video games, Human Traffic and The Business, and of course, the immortal Danny Dyer’s Deadliest Men.
He is father to one half of everyone’s favourite Love Island couple, who also happens to be named Dani Dyer.
He repeatedly called former Prime Minister David Cameron a “twat”, and demanded he face up the Brexit shitstorm he has caused instead of “sitting in Nice with his trotters up”.
And if all that isn’t enough to make you love the man, then, well, just know he regularly says things like the following phrases, arranged neatly into a soundboard for you:
You won’t be able to click because it’s a screenshot, but do follow this link to ‘Danny Dyer’s Propa Nawty Soundboard’ and listen to some of the sheer poetry that comes out of his mouth to your heart’s content.
Better still, remove your headphones and play it aloud for the rest of the office because who doesn’t need a ‘nice one bruvva’ or ‘propa geezer like’ moment of support now and then?
Alternatively, use it to demand pork scratchins, inform people that this, in fact, IS your manor, or tell certain individuals to sod off via Danny Dyer instead of passive aggressive email.
Here’s a Danny Dyer supercut just to get you in the mood:
