The theory is so popular that the group have launched a tour across the US.
The moon landings were faked. JFK was killed by the FBI. Bill Gates is microchipping us with vaccines. The Earth is flat. The world of conspiracy theories is a weird and sometimes dangerous one. But I think this one definitely falls into the weird category.
Birds Aren’t Real is a ‘meta conspiracy movement’ that claims the pigeons, crows, magpies and other birds we see everyday are in fact…. surveillance devices planted by the government.
Vice report that the conspiracy theory got underway in 2017 on social media, but the leader of the idea claims that the movement has its roots in the 1970s. They argue that the US government has been engaging in a decades-long and generational campaign to rid the country of birds, replacing them with surveillance devices.
Followers suggest that between 1959 and 2001, successive governments killed roughly 12 billion birds with a secret virus and have been carefully replacing them with covert spy technology.
The initial aim of the mass bird genocide was supposedly to stop the vast amounts of bird poo being dropped on the nation, but that the crafty CIA soon realised they could use the concept of birds to spy on us.
Leader Peter McIndoe said: “I think the evidence is all around us, birds sit on power lines, we believe they’re charging on power lines, we believe that bird poop on cars is liquid tracking apparatus.”
Now, the movement have gone on a nation-wide tour of the US to raise awareness of their cause.
The first stop on the tour was in Springfield, with hundreds turning out to show their belief in the conspiracy theory, although I’d suggest more than a few present had their tongues firmly in cheeks.
https://www.instagram.com/p/CQg-JURB48r/
It seems like it’s a massive movement as well. On Instagram, the Birds Aren’t Real account has 325,000 followers, with a further 67,000 followers on Twitter, and the movement even has its own merch.
In a statement, the group say: “Our movement is quickly approaching a critical juncture. As we grow stronger in number, more and more highly classified information is being relayed to us by whistleblowers across the nation. Expect massive leaks soon.”
They even claim that different breeds of so-called birds have different skill sets. Apparently vultures are mainly used for public sanitation and watch out if you see a hummingbird because apparently they are assassination drones. Obviously.
So now that you’re armed with this vital information, you’re probably wondering what you should now do next time you see one of these surveillance drones. Well, apparently you should establish dominance and “look the bird straight in the eyes and declare the following statement confidently ‘I know your secret. I know that you are a surveillance drone in disguise.'”
Then just watch your back for hummingbirds seeking you out to keep you silent…
