The birds are watching you!
You might remember a bizarre conspiracy theory circulating over the past month. The Birds Aren’t Real movement is slated to originate back in the ’70s, though contrastingly, Vice reports it was actually in 2017. Though you may immediately laugh at the idea, there is now solid proof that this is real, well, kind of.
Their website details an elaborate history of scandal and espionage, which ultimately led to all birds being replaced by government-monitored drones.
Leader Peter McIndoe said: “I think the evidence is all around us, birds sit on power lines, we believe they’re charging on power lines, we believe that bird poop on cars is liquid tracking apparatus.”
A video has surfaced on TikTok with supposed proof of the elaborate American scheme. With 8 million views, 2 million likes and over 20,000 comments, this is quickly becoming bigger than Area 51, more complicated than the flat earth theory, and more important than 5G chips.
TikTok user @cirruslyyesterday captions her video “The cars of the sky”.
“I finally found proof that birds are battery-powered drones.”
@cirruslyyesterdayThe cars of the sky ##showerthot ##seagull ##animalsurvival♬ Bezos I – Bo Burnham
Ironically set to Bo Burnhams Bezos I; she turns her camera to face two seagulls, only one of them is riding on the back of another, charging perhaps?
The realisation obviously shook TikTok commentators:
“His battery was [about] to die, so his friend had to carry him to the powerline,” one writes, confirming our suspicions.
“They’re just recreating Alladin,” says another.
But the comment of the video award goes to Faye, who said: “She hasn’t posted since this video.”
Thankfully, the user has since posted, meaning one of two things. Either, she was taken by the government and mind-controlled to forget the ordeal. Or the second and least likely alternative, she just didn’t post to TikTok for a few days.
