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Footballers have – in recent history at least – always been known for their flamboyance. Whether it’s George Best strutting around like one of The Beatles, Cristiano Ronaldo rocking the flared jeans and spaghetti hair or David Beckham somehow looking good in a sarong, it is something that we have come to expect.
As such, it was no surprise when – during the most recent episode of Jack Whitehall: Training Days – a conversation with Cesc Fabregas and his Chelsea teammates quickly turned to his own style choices; most notably his famously hilarious haircut during his early years at Arsenal.
Just take a breath and let that soak in for a second. Take your time. Okay, you ready? Good. After that starter, enjoy the main course: a collection of the weirdest and most memorable haircuts worn by footballers.
Taribo West
Here is Taribo West. He is a Nigeria legend and spent time at Inter Milan and Derby County during his career. He also pioneered the shoelace haircut, not to be confused with the spaghetti do. He somehow pulled it off, but that doesn’t mean it was good.
Jack Grealish
Grealish is a very talented young player who has really come into his own this season. One thing that hasn’t improved however is his hair, which continues to look like another man’s hair has been placed upon his head.
David Beckham
David Beckham is a style icon, but that doesn’t mean he can get away with a mohawk. Nobody can. It is a hairstyle which resembles a speed bump, or a moustache for your head. It should not be on a human’s head, and definitely not a head as sweet as dear Becks’.
Hector Bellerin
Another example of a fine looking man utterly ruining himself with a strange haircut. This haircut – which is somewhere between cornrows and a style befitting a warrior princess in a post-apocalyptic Netflix exclusive – should not have been on his head.
Raul Meireles
Meireles is a fine player and, to some, a style icon. He is a man who knows what he likes and isn’t afraid to go out and wear it. But at one point he did unfortunately look like this. Presumably this was during his ‘Brixton DJ who likes to experiment with the very idea of shapes’ phase, but still, that’s no excuse.
Rodrigo Palacio
Oh, Rodrigo Palacio. You are a man with a nice face. But your rat’s tale looks like a piece of string which has been beaten by the wind and rain for centuries, but still will never break. You are strong, but bad.
Abel Xavier
In truth, I could have chosen any of Abel Xavier’s haircuts throughout history. The former Portugal international could open a museum dedicated purely to his own hairstyles, but it is this one – one I have dubbed Intergalactic Space Commander – which really takes the biscuit.
The volume, the amount of gel and time and work which has gone into constructing it, like a man creating a circus tent out of mashed potato, which truly makes it the best worst footballer hairstyle of all time.
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