First Ronaldo, then Maradona, Michael Essien and now…. Asamoah Gyan.
Over the last 12 months we have grown accustomed to increasingly grotesque depictions of famous footballers through the medium of sculpture.
The first to hit the headlines was that of Cristiano Ronaldo, who was immortalised by his native Madeira after Portugal’s Euro 2016 triumph. We all know what the statue looks like, but if you want a nightmare refresher you’ll see it below.
While that is no doubt nightmarish, it’s only slightly worse than the next one that hit the headlines; this time of severely crushed World Cup winner Diego Maradona. It would have been reasonable to think that things simply couldn’t get worse.
But oh, you naive fool, how wrong you were. Because now, not long after the emergence of a Robot Michael Essien statue, comes the discovery of quite possibly the creepiest of all.
Uncovered and posted on Twitter by Ghanaian journalist Saddick Adams, the latest monstrosity to become burned into our collective retinas is of none other than Asamoah Gyan.
The new statue, which was created by the sculptor behind the Essien masterpiece, was designed to commemorate Gyan’s achievement of becoming Ghana’s all-time top scorer.
However, it appears to depict something altogether more sinister. Firstly, it looks partly like Gyan is a Subbuteo man come to life, before being cruelly rendered inanimate as he attempts to flee.
There’s also the tricky question of his legs, sunken as they are, which create the image of a man attempting to escape the clutches of a group of demons dragging him to Hell.
Despite this, the man himself seems quite content with the finished product. If nothing else, we hope this latest creation inspires would-be artists to create more hilarious and terrifying football sculptures befitting the world in 2018.
