There are few people more ‘online’ than Patrice Evra
The former Manchester United left-back lives on the internet, posting videos about everything and nothing. His videos have involved him singing in his car, carving a pumpkin and wearing a dreadlocked wig, with the end goal in all of them seemingly being to have fun.
His most recent video though does not appear to have an end goal though, unless that end goal is to contract salmonella. Perhaps you had sometimes in the past found yourself wondering whether Evra would soon create more videos containing raw meat, perhaps you had not.
It doesn’t really matter though, because he clearly has wondered this, and as such he has done something to remedy the notable lack of raw meat-based videos in his back catalogue, in the form of him kissing and caressing a raw chicken.
https://twitter.com/VincentMnV/status/1065270048368013312
Upon watching the video you will no doubt find yourself feeling very, very strange – maybe even a bit upset – and probably find yourself asking ‘why is he doing this?’ and ‘doesn’t he realise how sick he’s going to get soon?’.
We asked ourselves similar questions, and we do not have the answers to these questions.
Instead, we have simply more questions, because what Evra is doing is not only dangerous but also extremely disgusting. What was he thinking? Spanking the chicken is bad enough, but then to bite into its skin to the extent that there is a bit of skin on his lip? It’s fucking horrific.
Perhaps he wants salmonella and you know what, that’s his prerogative. And he probably has it too. Urgh.
