So this is it folks: the new season is here.
After a summer with only the Euros, the Olympics and a raft of post and then pre-season friendlies to sustain your football needs, finally the Premier League is back.
It all kicks off tomorrow with Hull City vs Leicester City opening the batting in the lunchtime game on Saturday.
Right now, anything is possible. Anything could happen. To paraphrase Doc Brown: the future hasn’t been written yet, it is what you make it. After all, who would have predicted Leicester City to be champs in this column last year?
We asked the finest minds of the JOE team for their predictions on the season ahead. And just to make it legit, we also asked the Football Manager 2016 guys to run a season-long simulation so we know what will happen.
Premier League Champions
Carl Anka
I want to say Arsenal. However I am sensible and will say Chelsea. They have Hazard. They have Conte. They have Kante. They have no European football to distract themselves with.
Dion Fanning
Manchester United. It’s wide open this season, but United have bought well. They’ll have to deal with the Europa League but Mourinho will be able to manage that.
Tom Victor
Manchester City. With so little to choose (in theory) between the top sides, it will come down to star quality, and Sergio Aguero will always get points on the board for you. Manchester United will run them close after buying very well, but City have stronger foundations on which to build.
Joe Gilmore
I’d have to go for Manchester United as champions this year. They’ve bought so much talent over the summer it’d be a joke if they don’t go on and win it. With the way Zlatan is performing at the moment they seem unstoppable.
Rob Burnett
Manchester City. They underperformed badly last season once it was confirmed Manuel Pellegrini was leaving. Pep Guardiola was the man they always wanted – and they wanted him for a reason. Expect him to mould that team into a winning machine.
Kevin Beirne
I’ve got to be really boring here and say Chelsea. Antonio Conte is a great coach and he’ll be working with the guts of the team that won the title two years, with the addition of a more experience Thibaut Courtois and N’Golo Kante. Also, the lack of European football as a distraction is a real plus.
Football Manager
Pep Guardiola leads Manchester City to the title in his first season in the Premier League. His side finish on 88 points – five ahead of Manchester United.
**
Top four (in order)
Carl Anka
Chelsea, Manchester City, Arsenal, Manchester United.
Dion Fanning
Manchester United, Chelsea, Manchester City, Liverpool
Tom Victor
Manchester City, Manchester United, Chelsea, Arsenal. Flip third and fourth if Arsenal sign a proper striker.
Joe Gilmore
Manchester United, Chelsea, Arsenal, Manchester City
Rob Burnett
Manchester City, Manchester United, Chelsea, Arsenal.
Kevin Beirne
Chelsea, Manchester City, Manchester United, Tottenham.
Football Manager
Manchester City, Manchester United, Chelsea, Arsenal.
**
Bottom three
Carl Anka
Hull are doomed. Burnley have the same core of players that got relegated so that’s them as well. I also reckon Swansea will be in trouble.
Dion Fanning
Leicester obviously. Just kidding. Hull. Sunderland and Burnley.
Tom Victor
Hull have about six players and Watford have made their squad too weird to stay up. The third spot is up for grabs, but I think West Brom might finally drop down, Pulis or no Pulis
Joe Gilmore
Hull are screwed. Burnley and Bournemouth are in there for me too.
Rob Burnett
Hull are down already. I can’t see Burnley having enough and I think Watford will have a case of Second Season Syndrome.
Kevin Beirne
Hull are treating the upcoming Premier League season with the same amount of urgency I gave to my final year of uni. Â And while I scraped a pass, I don’t think pulling an all-nighter the day before their opening game will have any benefit.
Let’s also say Burnley becuase I don’t know a lot about them. Since others have already said Sunderland and Swansea, I’m going to say Bournemouth.
Football Manager
Middlesbrough, Burnley, Hull.
**
Where will Leicester finish?
Carl Anka
Top 10 is the aim apparently, very possible providing Mahrez stays. Make it 8th. Have em battle Palace and Stoke for the “Best of the Rest”.
Dion Fanning
Anywhere from seventh to 12th.
Tom Victor
They’ll flirt with relegation as the extra games take their toll, before cruising to 11th or 12th. Picture 2015/16 Chelsea, only without the court dates.
Joe Gilmore
I think they’ll finish a solid sixth. If they hold on to enough players that is.
Rob Burnett
Tenth. Maybe. Champions League football will take it’s toll, as will the loss of Kante. 10th would be a good finish for them. Anything else is a bonus.
Kevin Beirne
I’m still firmly in the “anything besides relegation is a bonus for Leicester” camp. I know they won it all last season, but a top-half finish would be good for them this time around. I’m going to say 13th.
Football Manager
Tenth, on 57 points.
**
Champions League winner
Carl Anka
Dortmund. They’re overdue. They have a well balanced spinning dervish of a team built for one off battles. It’s about time.
Dion Fanning
Bayern Munich. Going to be interesting how the players respond to Carlo Ancelotti’s very different methods, but the Champions League suits his ways.
Tom Victor
*Checks calendar* we’ll end the season in an odd-numbered year, so that means Barcelona. Next?
Rob Burnett
Gareth and Ronnie will combine for one last hurrah at Real Madrid (For Ronnie) – before he swans off to the PSG Retirement Home For Once-Top Level Footballers.
Kevin Beirne
The Champions League has become so top-heavy recently that it’s hard to look past the big three of Bayern, Real Madrid and Barcelona. I’m going to go for Barcelona because I can’t see Real repeating and Bayern need things to fall their way more than the Spanish clubs would.
Football Manager
Barcelona win the trophy for the sixth time in their history, beating PSG 3-1 in the final. The goals come courtesy of Messi and a Neymar brace.
**
FA Cup
Carl Anka
Arsenal win the FA Cup and it papers over the cracks of late era Wenger. So it ever was.
Dion Fanning
The thought of the FA Cup, and the third round weekend in January particularly, fills me with despair so it’s hard to get excited about what happens after that. I’ll go for Chelsea.
Tom Victor
Chelsea. Even if Antonio Conte can’t do enough for a title challenge, he’ll get his players up for one-off cup games with little trouble.
Joe Gilmore
Everton. Tell yer ma.
Rob Burnett
Manchester United. I think the League is a step too far for United this season – but Mourinho will go all out for the cups.
Kevin Beirne
Manchester City. Pep Guardiola doesn’t just want to take part, he wants to dominate. I’m imagining a cup double for City before they kick on for the league title next season. To be honest though, if any of City, Chelsea, Arsenal, Spurs, Liverpool or Man United find themselves out of the top four race by February, expect them to focus on the FA Cup.
Football Manager
Chelsea claim their eighth FA Cup after beating Manchester City 1-0 at Wembley. Nemanja Matic’s eighth minute strike is enough to earn Conte’s men the spoils.
**
League Cup
Carl Anka
I think Spurs are due a good cup run, and it always ends up being a League Cup that throws this up? Give it to them.
Dion Fanning
Manchester City. Pep has a lot of things to change but City enjoy this competition so they might continue that tradition.
Tom Victor
Jurgen Klopp loves a cup run, and Liverpool are due a scrambled victory over a team they should be putting three or four past in normal circumstances.
Joe Gilmore
I’d put a bet on a team like Oldham winning it this year and narrowly beating Liverpool 2-1 in the final. I can envision the fume already.
Rob Burnett
Manchester United. I’m going for a cup double for United. Jose loves the League Cup – he always likes to get an early trophy under his belt. Shows he means business and gives his players a taste of success they will then want again and again.
Kevin Beirne
Manchester City will beat Manchester United in the League Cup final and Jose Mourinho will call it a fake trophy in his post-match presser.
Football Manager
Liverpool lift the inaugural EFL Cup, beating Watford 2-0 in the final. Daniel Sturridge gives Liverpool the lead before a poor challenge by Craig Cathcart gives away a penalty and earns the defender a red card. Sturridge slots away the penalty to give Klopp his first trophy as Liverpool boss.
**
Top scorer
Carl Anka
If his hamstrings manage, Sergio Aguero. If not, Diego Costa. If his hamstrings don’t then I don’t care. I’m sick of picking Rooney for this.
Dion Fanning
Harry Kane. Betting against Aguero’s hamstrings.
Tom Victor
Despite age, Premier League experience and general logic suggesting otherwise, I can see Zlatan Ibrahimovic having a ‘van Persie 2012/13’ of a season.
Joe Gilmore
Zlatan. Because Zlatan.
Rob Burnett
Sergio Aguero. He’s very good at doing football goals.
Kevin Beirne
Sergio Aguero is the best striker in the Premier League but his body just can’t hold together for long enough. Harry Kane nicks it based purely on his ability to not get injured regularly.
Football Manager
- Sergio Aguero (24 goals)
- Zlatan Ibrahimovic (19 goals)
- Harry Kane (18 goals)
- Romelu Lukaku (17 goals)
- Alexis Sanchez (15 goals)
**
Player of the season
Carl Anka
Kante. It was always Kante.
Dion Fanning
Henrikh Mkhitaryan.
Tom Victor
Roberto Firmino. And Liverpool fans will be all the more unbearable for it.
Joe Gilmore
Hopefully Kante continues how he played for Leicester at Chelsea. I’d go for him.
Rob Burnett
Paul Pogba. He’d better be, for £89million.
Kevin Beirne
Eden Hazard returns to form and leads Chelsea to a title now that he doesn’t have to worry about European football (and knows that Real Madrid will be looking for a new record-signing this summer).
Football Manager
Kevin De Bruyne earns the award after a superb season where he earned an average match rating of 8.34, created eleven assists and scored nine goals.
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