You can’t knock the imagination
We’re reaching the stage of the summer where we are officially gone from last season to summer break to where we are now, pre-season. Pre-season means many things, but particularly it means that we are now getting lots of kits emerging for the season
The most recent and eye catching shirt to emerge is the reported new Manchester United away kit.
Made by adidas, the shirt – which was featured in an article on kit leak aficionados website Footy Headlines before being officially unveiled by Manchester United – is interesting.
It has a gold design, as Manchester United away shirts have occasionally had in the past. Well, once at least.
But what’s different about this shirt is the bizarre snakeskin pattern – that classic look that every child adores from the moment their grandfather gifts them their first pair of snakeskin boots.
Inspired by the streets of Manchester, Manchester United drop their brand new gold away kit. pic.twitter.com/HsjSlxXudS
— FootballJOE (@FootballJOE) July 12, 2019
Looking at this shirt one can’t help but wonder what may have inspired it, especially when so many other possible design choices, such as ‘black’, ‘white’ ‘black with a white trim’ and ‘something nice’ might have been chosen.
So let’s try and get into the mind of a designer for a moment if we may, and attempt to deduce what inspired this shirt.
3) A literal snake
Going with the obvious here. It’s snakeskin, so one can only assume that literal snakes came up in conversation. Considering how creative meetings work, there was undoubtedly mention of what a snake signifies, what values it holds, and how these values can be used to represent Manchester United Football Club ™.
Snakes have cold blood, as you may well know, and perhaps the choice of snakeskin is a sign that the club want Manchester United’s players to be ruthless and to also swallow their opponents in one gulp.
Snakes also shed their skin, perhaps a hope that this team can cast off the oppressive shackles of mediocrity which have weighed them down for too long, and emerge this season as a better team.
Most crucially though, snakes have no arms or legs and slither around the ground on their bellies in search of sustenance and a better life, much like Phil Jones.
Last time Phil Jones played against Arsenal, he did this😂😂👌👌 #MUFC #MUFCvAFC pic.twitter.com/4RgCBVAt1t
— Daniel MUFC🔴⚽️ (@DanielB1197) November 19, 2016
2) Knockoff designer handbags
Wow. Look at that handbag. Nice, isn’t it? Probably cost a lot of money, eh? Sure to set you back a pretty penny.
But what if I told you that while this bag has, on the surface, all the elements of something which costs a lot of money, it is in fact just a pale imitation of a quality product.
What if I told you that the inside of the bag has loose hems and pins occasionally sticking out to prick your fingers. What if I told you that in certain circumstances, such as when it is too warm or too cold or too wet or too temperate the bag simply falls apart, under barely any pressure whatsoever.
Please tell me you see what I’m getting at here. The bag is Manchester United, alright?! It is a metaphor. I learned them in college.
1) Manchester United’s very own Paul Pogba
Manchester United’s best player. World Cup winner. Global superstar. Returning son. Surely, for the love of all that is good, he would be the person to bring the good old days back to Old Trafford.
Except he’s been a bit hit and miss. Some believe he got Jose sacked. And as soon as Jose left the building Pogba was brilliant, before quickly disappearing again when the team needed him most.
With his quotes to Japanese media about looking for a new challenge, the snake emoji is certain to chase Pogba around social media this summer. And what better way to remind him not to be a sssnake than by forcing him to pose in a snakeskin shirt. Genius.
