This is an exclusive.
Today at midday, Big Ben rang out his final bongs ahead a four-year silence.
This is being done to facilitate some essential maintenance work on the clock, but also to graciously allow the internet to create some dank memes.
We were lucky enough to secure an interview with Big Ben himself right as his final bongs were heard.
Me: Pleasure to meet you Big Ben, how are you feeling ahead of your four-year silence?
Big Ben: Bong bong bong bong bong bong bong.
Me: Totally understandable. Do you know what kind of maintenance work they’re going to be dong on you?
Big Ben: Bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong. Bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong.
Me: Oh wow, quite extensive. Is it just the liver or has it spread elsewhere?
Big Ben: Bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong. Bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong. Bong!
Me: Well at least that’s something positive. Are you looking forward to a bit of peace and quiet?
Big Ben: Bong bong.
Me: Hahaha! What about all these MPs lining up to witness your final bongs?
Big Ben: Bong bong bong bong bong bong bong. Bong bong bong. Bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong. Bong bong bong bong bong bong bong.
Me: Mind your language. You’re 157 years old now Ben, what kind of changes in the world have you seen in your time?
Big Ben: Bong bong bong bong bong bong bong. Bong bong bong. Bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong. Bong bong bong bong bong bong bong. Bong bong bong bong bong bong bong. Bong bong bong. Bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong. Bong bong bong bong bong bong bong.
Me: You’re exactly right, she’s a terrible woman. There’s been quite a bit of controversy about your repairs taking four years. In your opinion, will it really take that long?
Big Ben: Bong bong bong bong bong.
Me: Interesting, and it’s definitely a cover-up? Conspiracy theorists are going to love this!
Big Ben: Bong bong bong. Bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong. Bong bong bong. Bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong. Bong? Bong bong bong.
Me: This is huge! And you’re sure we can have the exclusive on this?
Big Ben: Bong bong.
Me: Wow. I’m shaking. I had no idea that this kind of thing was still going on in 2017. You’re absolutely positive it’s Darius Danesh at the centre of it all?
Big Ben: Bong bong bong. Bong bong. Bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong. Bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong. Bong bong bong bong bong bong bong. Bong bong bong bong bong bong bong-
Me: I hate to cut you off, but I see we’re just approaching midday. A huge crowd has gathered beneath you. Any final words?
Big Ben: Bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong.
Me: Haha! You’re hilarious, you should really do stand-up.
Big Ben:
Me: Thanks so much for taking the time to chat with us here at JOE.
Big Ben:
Me: Oh right, you’re silent now. Enjoy the next four years!
Big Ben:
