WWE SummerSlam is coming to Brooklyn this Sunday and things are looking big.
The first big pay-per-view event since the WWE Draft, SummerSlam sees WWE’s biggest and brightest stars descend on New York to knock seven bells out of each other.
It’s a lot of fun, and will air at 1am Monday 22 August.
Who in their right mind would stay up until the early hours of a weekday to watch some scripted (amazing) fighting?
You, that’s who.
Here’s why you should do the decent (degenerate) thing and call in sick on Monday morning to watch some ‘rassling.
Finn Balor vs. Seth Rollins will usher in a new era of wrestling
WWE has been going big, pushing an emerging “New Era” of wrestling. The Attitude Era is more than 15 years ago, (god we feel old), John Cena is pushing forty (Oh God make it stop): wrestling is bringing in some much needed new blood.
Over the past few years, WWE has snapped up, trained and helped create some the of the most compelling and adventurous wrestlers in the world ,and they will be all on show at SummerSlam. NXT (WWE’s developmental brand) call-ups Alexa Bliss and Carmella will be squaring off on opposing teams in a six-woman Tag Team bout. Athletic high flyer Apollo Crews will be challenging the Miz for the Intercontinental Championship.
Headlining the whole thing will be new RAW roster recruit (and Ireland’s very own) Finn Balor against former WWE World Heavyweight Champion Seth Rollins. Both men are some of the most versatile and creative wrestlers around. Both men are capable of making you love or hate them with simple punch. One of these men paints himself as a demon wrestler while the other is capable of doing 720 Phoenix Splashes (that’s a whole lot of flippy shit).
SummerSlam is going to bring in a lot of fresh new exciting wrestlers. And then have them hit each other a lot. Ace. Go watch.
Women’s Wrestling Takes Over
Just over a year ago, the WWE had a “Divas Revolution”, calling up three Women Superstars from NXT. Becky Lynch, Charlotte (daughter of the legendary Ric) Flair and Sasha Banks made their debut and took women’s wrestling to new levels. The trios’ triple-threat match at Wrestlemania was an all time classic and this time around, Sasha Banks will be facing Charlotte for the WWE Women’s Title.
Women’s wrestling has come a long way in the past 18 months. SummerSlam is where it’ll all come to a head.
Suplex City vs. Viperville
Brock Lesnar is a 6ft 2, 286 lbs colossus of a man who has a tattoo on his lower back that reads “KILL THEM ALL“.
Brock Lesnar broke The Undertaker’s Undefeated Streak and then dropped John Cena on his head SIXTEEN times for fun at Summerslam 2014.
Brock Lesnar has a tramp stamp that reads “KILL THEM ALL”.
Brock Lesnar is so scary no one wants to point out the sword tattoo he has on his chest (which someone then turned into an IRL sword) looks like a [REDACTED].
Brock Lesnar has a tramp stamp that reads “KILL THEM ALL”.
Brock Lesnar is so scary that if you threw him into a Lion’s Den, he’d probably emerge with a really nice fur coat. That he responsibly talked the lions into donating, explaining that it’d be less hassle to give to him than if they fought.
Brock Lesnar has a tramp stamp that reads “KILL THEM ALL”.
And now he’s running into the equally big (seriously television doesn’t do justice to the man), equally terrifying, equally “I have a special move that would make all your muscles explode“, Superstar Randy Orton.
Splendid.
Your body clock will already be wrecked from UFC 202
This won’t be your first rodeo this weekend. We know what you’re about son. Lean into that weird and stay up late for another Big Fight Night.
You don’t like your job *that* much anyway
C’mon, do we really have to convince you to not go to work? C’mon buddy.
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