Sh*t just got real.
You may or may not be aware that nuclear armageddon is on the cards for 2018. Supreme leader Kim Jong-un kicked off the New Year by bragging “a nuclear button is always on my desk. This is reality, not a threat,” and followed that up by cheerily adding, “The entire United States is within range [of our nuclear weapons].”
Happy new year, everyone!https://t.co/DvUGZzcOrN
— JOE (@JOE_co_uk) January 1, 2018
Not to be outdone, President Donald Trump of the United States of America (still weird to say that) responded in kind, bragging about the size of his own nuclear button (presumably in relation to his tiny little doll hands):
North Korean Leader Kim Jong Un just stated that the “Nuclear Button is on his desk at all times.” Will someone from his depleted and food starved regime please inform him that I too have a Nuclear Button, but it is a much bigger & more powerful one than his, and my Button works!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) January 3, 2018
Well, we’re sad to report that a far more troubling clash of superpowers has transpired in the hours since Don and Kim’s nuclear dick-waving exploits. That’s because KFC have essentially declared war on McDonald’s, again via Twitter.
Colonel Sanders (we’re guessing he mans the account) mimicked his President with a threat of his own – squarely targeted towards old advisory Ronald McDonald.
McDonald’s leader Ronald just stated he has a “burger on his desk at all times”. Will someone from his big shoed, red nosed regime inform him that I too have a burger on my desk, but mine is a box meal which is bigger and more powerful than his, and mine has gravy! #nuclearbutton
— KFC UK (@KFC_UKI) January 3, 2018
It reads:
‘McDonald’s leader Ronald just stated he has a “burger on his desk at all times”. Will someone from his big shoed, red nosed regime inform him that I too have a burger on my desk, but mine is a box meal which is bigger and more powerful than his, and mine has gravy! #nuclearbutton’
At the time of writing, the big clown had yet to respond to the inflammatory statement. But that’s enough about Trump, never had Ronald.
