Just like Christmas morning for a spoiled brat, there’s a lot to unpack here.
Yesterday, President Donald Trump met with Kim Kardashian to speak about prison reform and sentencing.
I would like to thank President Trump for his time this afternoon. It is our hope that the President will grant clemency to Ms. Alice Marie Johnson who is serving a life sentence for a first-time, non-violent drug offense.
— Kim Kardashian (@KimKardashian) May 31, 2018
Inevitably, both self-confessed narcissists decided to get a photograph together to commemorate the occasion.
Great meeting with @KimKardashian today, talked about prison reform and sentencing. pic.twitter.com/uOy4UJ41JF
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) May 30, 2018
If that isn’t the perfect poster for a movie about a maniac president whose daughter has other plans, plans that don’t involve being a respectable first daughter just to keep daddy happy, then I don’t know what is.
There’s a lot to unpack in the photograph and also quite a few hidden gems, so let’s take a closer look.
Trump is wearing a jelly ring
What does a man that consumes 12 cans of Diet Coke each day wear as an accessory during his line of work, which is to represent the entire nation of the United States? Obviously a jelly ring. Bite mark optional.
Kim is wearing a Livestrong bracelet
Kim wtf? They haven’t been fashionable since 2004 and then became illegal right around the time when Lance Armstrong admitted to being a big massive cheat. Retro fashion is always cool, but this is unforgivable.
Trump has two framed photographs of Alf in his office
Not his children, not his wife, not himself, Alf. An Alien Life Form is perched on Donald Trump’s desk, presumably to provide guidance and inspiration to the President of the United States. Sweet.
There’s a predator knocking at the window
Alright wtf is going on here? Surely the photographer would’ve noticed the future King of England scurrying over to the window, then pounding it down to get Kim’s attention? What kind of clown have they got running the place?
There’s a Happy Meal box poorly hidden behind the desk
Yeah, POTUS is fond of a Micky Doodles every once in a while, what harm? But a Happy Meal? That’s pathetic, albeit forgivable. McDonalds’ current Happy Meal toys are mini board games, which is an exceptional idea, so I’m willing to overlook this blunder.
There’s an engraving on the desk, but what is it?
IT’S HILLARY DIANE RODHAM CLINTON’S BIRTHDAY WTF WHEN DID SHE PUT THAT THERE WHAT A SCAMP MAYBE WE SHOULD JUST GIVE HER THE DESK AND ALSO THE OFFICE AND TITLE OF PRESIDENT HAHA JUST A THOUGHT?
One of the flags is on fire
The United States Army flag is on fire, which is slightly more comforting that the United States flag being on fire, but not by much. Give it a moment or two and the entire office will go up in literal flames, which makes a nice change from the usual metaphorical ones it’s engulfed in.
WTF That’s not actually Kim Kardashian at all
HANG ON, IT’S… IT CAN’T BE? IT’S MELANIA! We have been fooled beyond belief. What a pair of tricksters, they have shown us. Fake news is alive and well in the year of our Lord 2018.
WTF THEY’RE UNDERWATER
No somebody is taking the piss now. That wasn’t there before?
WTF NOW THEY’RE IN SPACE THIS IS NONSENSE I GIVE UP SOMEONE IS MESSING WITH US
FAKE NEWS FAKE NEWS FAKE NEWS FAKE NEWS!
Original image via Twitter
