March, am I right?
It’s been another strong month for tweets, so a hearty well done goes out to all involved.
Once again we’ve been reminded that if nothing else, Twitter continues to be a great source of legitimate genius despite the entire world crumbling all around us at all times. We must protect it (the good part of it) at all costs.
Topics covered this month included Brexit (obviously), the necessary logistics of having a guacamole fountain, Sinbad, journalist headshots, Ash Wednesday, the sweetness of cereals and much more.
Here’s 25 of the funniest tweets you might’ve missed in March.
1.
the funniest thing i’ve ever said was on april 11th 2009 to my dad’s cat and no one else was around to hear it. a car horn honked and he hopped off my bed and ran downstairs and i said “oh shit is your ride here” and laughed alone to myself for like five minutes straight
— old tom (@YuckyTom) March 1, 2019
2.
https://twitter.com/RomeshRanga/status/1103635606847012864
3.
please doctor… my son…. he’s fergalicious
— eric curtin (@dubstep4dads) March 7, 2019
4.
your 👏🏻 guacamole 👏🏻 fountain 👏🏻 will 👏🏻 go 👏🏻 brown 👏🏻 unless 👏🏻 you 👏🏻 set 👏🏻 up 👏🏻 the 👏🏻 lime 👏🏻 juice 👏🏻 misting 👏🏻 apparatus 👏🏻
— koyaanisqatsi heckler (@Arr) March 9, 2019
5.
https://twitter.com/Rachel_Sennott/status/1104510232821198848
6.
Mary: oh no my period is late
Joseph: oh no how late
Mary: I dunno, what's the date
Joseph: hmm according to the calendar it's 9 months BC
Mary: 9 months what now
— Abbie (@AbbieEvansXO) March 12, 2019
7.
https://twitter.com/caitiedelaney/status/1105521970060259328
8.
Sinbad:
1. Sailor
2. Comedian
3. Most succinct version of the Bible— Adrenalin (@adrenalindenver) March 13, 2019
9.
The most perfect thing to ever happen in Leicester @bt_uk pic.twitter.com/QlSvwITMKh
— Adam Weikert (@weikiemon) March 15, 2019
10.
https://twitter.com/PrayForPatrick/status/1106602115567357952
11.
Don't know how to delete tweets so please disregard the one earlier in which I said I had thought of a way to reverse global warming.
I've since been informed that everyone leaving their fridge door open for an hour a day will NOT in fact cool down the planet. Sorry about that
— Sir Michael (@Michael1979) March 17, 2019
12.
this is every journalist headshot pic.twitter.com/4SxZTgpn1k
— Ruchira Sharma (@RuchoSharma) March 19, 2019
13.
https://twitter.com/_garbage_girl_/status/1108502775254712321
14.
https://twitter.com/Ygrene/status/1108825548904714242
15.
Theresa May’s speeches. pic.twitter.com/q3P5g64FSD
— Anna Mazzola (@Anna_Mazz) March 20, 2019
16.
https://twitter.com/Rauss_Mc/status/1110680474463154177
17.
Here’s @JamesAcaster making pasta.
Fair play. pic.twitter.com/zWMRYw0zKG
— Josh Berry (@JoshBerryComedy) March 27, 2019
18.
a question pic.twitter.com/8tfM5Y2lkf
— phil (@PhilJamesson) March 28, 2019
19.
https://twitter.com/JenKoz4/status/1111635402908143616
20.
Watched the Michael Jackson doc in bed with the kids
— Mike Scully (@scullymike) March 10, 2019
21.
go on girl do your thang pic.twitter.com/tSzX63f3kk
— tri vo (@tribranchvo) March 18, 2019
22.
Yes it do be pic.twitter.com/ZqrQdZOBza
— Rads (@_radsy) March 18, 2019
23.
— vic (@victorcangil16) March 13, 2019
24.
I just find other cereals too sweet pic.twitter.com/N4M4nOQdc9
— Joe Rumrill (@2tonbug) March 1, 2019
25.
In the vast world of Christendom one church without spellcheck celebrated Ass Wednesday. pic.twitter.com/IzGhckiHz3
— Pádraig Belton (@PadraigBelton) March 7, 2019
Check out previous months: