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13th Oct 2016

Scotland will be having another referendum on independence before Brexit happens

You like referendums? Here, HAVE ALL THE REFERENDUMS FOREVER.

Kevin Beirne

Here we, here we, here we fucking go…

Are you sick of referendums? Are you sick of people correcting you and smugly telling you that you should actually being saying ‘referenda’ because they took one year of Latin in school? Are you also sick of people who did Latin for their A-levels correcting the people who corrected you and say that it is actually ‘referendums’ – just not for the reason you think it is, you blithering idiot. Why the fuck don’t you know what a gerundive is?

Are you sick of people making rash decisions about the future of your country because of some vague sense of freedom? Are you tired of these random choices taking up the entire news cycle for what feels like forever and then just ends up in you losing the ability to even buy a Cornetto at your local Tesco? Are you sick and tired of me asking you if you’re sick and tired of things?

Well, fuck you because we’re getting ANOTHER referendum. Well, more accurately, Scotland is getting one… Well, even more accurately than that, Scotland are putting the wheels in motion to get another referendum on independence after First Minister of Scotland Nicola Sturgeon announced that a new Independence Referendum Bill would be published for consultation next week.

“But they already had a vote on their independence two years ago? Why are they ignoring the will of the people?” We hear you cry at your computer screen like someone who doesn’t understand how computer screens work.

Well, it seems that Scotland isn’t really all that excited about this whole “Brexit” thing (remember that referendum?) and wants to opt out of it.

You see, while the United Kingdom voted in favour of leaving the European Union by a margin of 52% to 48%, the remain campaign actually won the Scottish vote by an astonishing 24 points. In any other context, that would be considered a landslide. For context, only 55% of Scots wanted to stay in the UK two years ago.

In fact, all 32 Scottish constituencies voted to remain in the EU but because of the lack of proportional representation in the referendum that spanned four countries (Northern Ireland also wanted to remain, by a margin of 56% to 44%).

One of the main selling points for Scotland to remain within the UK during the independence referendum of 2014 was the guaranteed EU membership, with many Scots worried that if they left the UK then they would have to go through the lengthy process of re-joining the EU.

But now that they’re leaving the EU anyway, there are suggestions that Scotland might decide fuck it, just go all-in and seek independence and attempt to re-join the EU themselves.

Of course, there is also another option for the Scots if they want a fast-track to regaining their EU membership…

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