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21st Aug 2017

Britain free to come back to its senses after Big Ben bongs its final bong for four years

A modest crowd applauded as they were finally allowed to get on with their lives once again

Rich Cooper

If there’s one thing Brits look forward to more than the end of a miserable summer, it’s the end of Silly Season.

This is the time of year when Parliament is in recess, meaning that there’s a dearth of news as all the MPs are on holiday and there’s nothing happening politically. Nothing important anyway. Not like trying to exit the EU or anything major like that.

Hey, speaking of ‘nothing important’, had you heard that Ben Ben is going to go quiet for four years while it undergoes repairs and restoration? You might have done, because for the last week people have either been talking about how stupid silencing Big Ben would be, or how stupid people who think silencing Big Ben is stupid are.

In short, it’s all a bit fucking stupid.

Thankfully, the day has arrived, and at midday on Monday, the Westminster Chimes rang out for one last time. A crowd gathered around Parliament to witness the moment and applauded as the final bong was bonged.

It’s unclear whether the applause was a mark of respect for the inanimate metal object or simply an expression of joy at everyone being able to put this nonsense behind them and actually get on with their lives.

Either way, it’s done now, and if anyone mentions the words ‘Big Ben’ and ‘bong’ and don’t embark on an amusing anecdote about their large friend Benjamin having a wee bit much of the old Mary Jane, they shall also be silenced for the next four years

Topics:

Big Ben,London